In the last 5 years, my success rate of reading a book from cover to cover has been really low, almost nil. I'd read a couple of pages or chapters and that's it, only to pick up the book again if the need arises.
Finding the time to read (and be focused at it) while coping with work, chores, child, rest etc. has been such a challenge. Reading never made its way up the priority list of things to do. Dwelling on the excuse was far more convenient than solving the problem. That said, I'm not all that lazy. I do try to attempt solving the problem or improving the situation.
So, in an attempt to solve the problem, at the start of the year, I made an ambitious resolution to complete at least 1 book per month. World leaders read at least 4-5 books/month (based on an article I read) so I thought setting a goal of 1 was me being realistic, taking baby steps compared to a giant leap.
Sadly, 8 months later, a random self-reflection moment while preparing for a culture sharing on Learning as a value reminded me that I had not read a single book since the start of the year. I felt really crappy about myself for a couple of days reflecting on my lack of discipline and determination in achieving this simple goal and towards the other goal of exercising, another area in my life that needs improvement. Mindset (determination) and habit (discipline) are such critical elements for a meaningful impactful purposeful life and I felt like I was missing both. I started beating myself up with negative thoughts like "that's why you're not successful" "that's why you're not progressing" "that's why you're underachieved" "that's why you are where you are right now and not up there where you could be" "that's why you're fat".... we're always our own worst critic.....
That said, I'm grateful that I'm not mentally weak and that the self-inflicted mental abuse didn't break me to pieces. After a couple of days of wallowing in excuse and guilt, I decided to step out of it, embrace and learn from this "failure". I decided to use Carina as my source of motivation. Motivated myself to make time to read every night to be a better role model to Carina as she watches and learns to develop the habit and joy of reading. I was also inspired by Richard's admirable habit of making digital coles notes of each chapter in the book as a way to summarize and recap learning points for future reference/sharing when needed - so I started doing that too.
So so happy that I accomplished the goal for this month - finally finishing 1 book from cover to cover and having coles notes on it. Well done, Alicia! Let's keep the momentum going for September! You can do it!
