The Raise - Must Read!

"The Raise." Enjoy! :)

The day the Penis asked for a raise...

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor.

I work at great depths.

I plunge headfirst into everything I do.

I do not get weekends or public holidays off..

I work in a damp environment.

I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.

I work in high temperatures.

My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,

P. Niss

The Response...

Dear P.Niss;

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,

the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.

You fall asleep after brief work periods.

You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.

You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

You will retire well before you are 65.

You are unable to work double shifts.

You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completedthe assigned task..

And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious- looking bags..

Sincerely,

V. Gina

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LOL!!!

I laughed my ass off reading this. So needed it..after being gloom and lifeless the entire day.

Awesome piece of work! Kudos to whoever wrote it. :)

All you pervs out there, if you like it, hit the LIKE button! hahahaha..

A beautiful discovery

Picture this.
A rainy evening. The skies are dark; the rain pours heavily; the traffic slow moving.
You look into your rear mirror. What do you see?
The reflection of the car headlights visibly clear on the seemingly glossy highway.
As you move forward, while stealing glimpses of the rear mirror, the yellow reflections seem to move along as well, somewhat dancing; graceful and serene in motion.
At that moment, you forget everything and find yourself with a weird sense of peace and comfort. And a smile on your face.
If only that moment; that sight could be captured. It would have been the year's best picture.
That was my beautiful discovery today. =)

The Opposition

Sometimes, it does feel like we are living on other people's lips.
Their words - like poison ivy. flying darts.
The opposition - they judge; they dictate; they slander; they assume!
Such hypocrisy and cowardness; did it stem from envy?
It makes one wonder.. whatever happened to love?

This path I've chosen will not be an easy one.
But I will perservere; with the support and encouragement from loved ones.
And I will chuck you slanderers into my bin of worthless people.
You don't deserve my help.
And this will be the last thing I ever do for you.