random ramblings

So..its New Year's Eve..hmm..WHAT ARE MY PLANS??

My boss, Mr. J called (that was really random of him..but oh well..its a good thing i guess?) and asked what are my plans for New Year's Eve and i said i had no plans! (why did i have to be so stupidly honest?!! then again, we're not suppose to lie..) and he went "What??!! No plans?? Come on! You're still young! etc etc etc.."
And there i was..given a lecture (all the way from Singapore) on how i should be enjoying life and doing something because i am still young of age..sighz..now he must think i;m some boring girl!

i kinda regret not lying. i should have said i was going to have some drinks and chill out with some friends, but i didn't. would he even bring me for social outings next time? haha..i doubt it.. but talking about having some drinks and chilling out, i really want to do that.. i guess i just don't know who to call?
siv told me he wanted to introduce me to his bunch of close friends but i havent heard from him for 5 days now..and he's all the way in JB.. wow, another disappointment i guess.. how things have abruptly changed in such a short duration of time. but that's life. i dont want to be depressing about it but naturally, i become depressed about it. sucky feeling totally..

met up with some high school mates and some of them are pretty good drinkers. its the drinking that helps them socialise and meet more people. sometimes, it seems like drinking makes them happy too. from the outside it seems as though people who drink are really happy cheery people. are they?? this isn't a good thought but sometimes..i do wish i belong in that category as well..an inner desire to be a competent alcoholic drinker.

while driving to work, every radio station was practically talking about resolutions. honestly, i cant even remember my resolutions for this year! how frustrating.. and demoralising..

i wanted to see the doctor yesterday but i waited for 45 minutes and the doctor hasnt even arrived. i gave up waiting and drove away.. my flu got worse (as usual) and this time, while blowing my nose, i discovered tiny globules of blood in my mucus. whoa..awesome discovery.. the blood globules really stand out and they were perfectly spherical in shape. showed it to my sisters..haha..major amusement for all.. anyway, it was really difficult to inhale and exhale and breath with only ONE functional nostril, and this went on for 4 days! i could hardly smell let alone have a proper taste of my food. Another sucky feeling totally..

couldn't sleep last night too, despite being very tired physically and mentally.. don't know why.. had to bribe my body into having some roti canai with hopes that it would surrender and rest, but no luck.. was up for another hour.. decided to do a proper prayer (one without me sleeping off while praying) and so, i talked to Him for a good long half an hour. i must say.. prayer is a powerful healing tool. For 5 days, i had been stupidly relying on my own ability (and perhaps even the doctor's ability) of trying to rid myself of the flu and cough but He cured it within a night. Awesomeness i would say :) God, you totally rock!
i guess i didn't want to bug Him with such petty issues, thinking i could solve them all on my own cos He's got better things to worry about but i realize that He wants to know it all..small or big the burden..